Wednesday 10 October 2012

Important to Muffin Munchers

IMPORTANT TO MUFFIN-MUNCHERS. - The march of modern legislation has in some matters kept pace with the march of intellect. The combined wisdom of both House of Parliament has succeeded in putting a stop to the slumber-breaking cry of "sweep" but as yet has signally failed in silencing that terrific to the tympanum tintinabulary clamour, the dustman's bell. As one great step towards this desirable consumation measures have at length been successfully adopted against its diminuitive mimic, the muffin-bell, and henceforth the lover of the tea delicacies of muffins and crumpets will have on Sundays to supply themselves otherwise than through those humble purveyors, who have time out of mind monopolised that branch of traffic. To those who rejoice in the partial extinction of their morning miseries, it will give pleasure to learn that the police have received orders to devote all their energies to the extirpation of that muffin merchants' calling and their exertions las Sunday have been crowned with great success. The magistrates Mr. Conant and Mr. Hall were applied to by the police for advice in an unlooked-for dilemma. In discharge of their new duties between four and five o'clock yesterday afternoon they heard the prohibited cry of 'Hot muffins' and on reaching the spot laid hold of the astonished muffin maker and took from him his stock, about 100 large and small. The Act of Parliament which legalised this seizure did not clearly specify the manner in which the property was to be disposed of, and it therefore became a point whether the muffins were to be devoted to feeding the police or the parish paupers.
     Mr. Conant inquired if the muffinman was present? for on looking at the Lord's Day Act, he found he was also liable to a penalty for trafficing in his commodities.
    The muffinman, however, was too good a judge to make his appearance, and the decision of the bench was that the man was to have his basket and the paupers were to have the muffins.

Morning Post, 1 November 1836

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